the WEIRD me..

it's about my weirdness...

things that i realize that when i done the things, people will act like i'm from Mars..

and some may weird to be done by a girl....

whatever people..it's just what i love to do and stuff i like...

and i'm happy doing those things...

nothing more...

1. i don't like pink

well maybe a lot don't like pink..but i just watch many2 girl crazily in love with pink....i don't get them...

2. i'm rough

emm...my daily action show this...i don't have kind of...soft and sweet like other girl...and it's uncontrol..well sometimes i try to act soft and sweet, but i end up acting like a robot..auchhh

3. i like boyish thing

yeah..i like sport.. tough sport especially martial art..i'm joining taekwondo class at secondary school and recently involve in muaythai (it's a famous Thai boxing)..and yet get conflict with my parents..ya..this is the case..uhuuu...

4. never wear skirt since i know how to buy clothes on my own

during my childhood, of course my mom is my designer..ya..she bought me everything..but i'm not sure since when i start to say no to dress...really2 forgot when and how...except for school uniform..i never wear dress...@_@

5. i don't like to have special bf..oh my..

waa..this one is very weird..since every girl like to have one or more..hehe..but for me...i like to be friend...with boy..but it's hard for me to committed with anyone...i prefer like... just friend...and i be friend with anyone...i treat all my friend same...boyfriend or girlfriend..when the relationship say friend..then it should be like stated...not more or less..... and for this case..i prefer one special bf for whole life...i mean if i decide to go steady with anyone..i hope for the lasting relationship..(just my dream and ideology ya...don't say anything about this..hehe)

6. i don't like thing that too much relaxing..

most people i know..like to work in a relaxing work place..mostly like to work in a air-conditioned office...wear nice dress..high heel..make up..etc.. but me..i don't like those thing...i prefer work that a bit tough..enjoying and wearing uniform..is what i want..:)

well that's all i remember rite now...will write up soon...

sorry #_#

alamak...

aku buat budak menangis

aiya...i make a kid cry..my bad

suddenly i'm just being too anger...and make a kid cry when i teach her homework....

why i suddenly become like that?? sometimes being too tempered...like an old woman...aiyaaa

so bad...

too bad...

i'm sorry for being to emo...tooo emoo...i'm sorry...

promise2...will change....

sooo sorry....#_#

penanam anggur untuk seminggu..

wuuu..suda seminggu menganggur sementara menunggu keja baru bermula..hehe

seminggu dok umah saja...mcm zaman bru pas abih blaja dulu..uhuhu
bosan gak la dok umah saja...mkn tdo tgk tv..emm tu je arr...
ada la kdg2 tu rajin skit p la excercise skit..huhu

pelik gak tetiba aku ne jadi lalu mkn cmne tah..waaa..bahaya ne...dah mkn tapi masih lapau lagi..ngaaa..ini merisaukan coz susah mau kawal berat badan...uhuu...adakah ini disebabkan kebahagiaan dalam perpisahan yang saya rasai setelah resign keja?? haha...no comment..ala..sapa tak sonang hati kan dok umah..mkn cukup...tdo terlebih cukop..emmm.smua pon best kecuali para2 nyamuk yg suka berkeliaran di waktu mlm..haha..maklum la umah dikelilingi sawah padi..maunyer xbyk nyamuk..tp xpe..apa guna ada ubat nyamuk kan..huhu

ckp pasal ubat nyamuk...skang ne byk jenis ubat nyamuk yg ada di pasaran..dulu zaman aku kecik2 yg popular tu ialah ubat nyamuk FUMAKILLA..wee...kotak kuning..lingkaran ubat nyamuk berwarna hijau...hek2..



tp skang bukan takat lingkaran hijau..berbagai2 kaler ada..merah..biru...pink (tipu ja)..emm...mcm2 kaler la..

tp2..skang orang da xpakai sgt da jenis2 lingkaran ne...sbb leceh skit...so smua pon guna alternatif lain la...ubat nyamuk jenis sembur2, elektrik, and yg mcm jenis pewangi kreta, atau nk yg senang gi yg jenis kertas mcm main2 lipat bunga gitu..huuh
(aku pon xpaham apsal tetiba terjadi promoter ubat nyamuk lak...lari tajuk der..)

k2...nak tdo da..ades..tdo pon kna selimut satu badan..xnk nyamuk gigit..pasang kipas kuat2 bagi nyamuk lari...pastu bila sejuk tutup kipas...nyamuk datang..pasang kipas sejuk....tutup kipas nyamuk...arrrggh....apakah??

saya da resign keje..

woo..saya dgn ini mengumumkan saya da resign dari keje semalam...tarikh 10 January 2011..huuhuu..cm xcaya je...

pasal tmpt keja saya ne...byk crita mrita yg berlaku kat saya sejak 3 bln saya kat situ...xmuat kot klu nk taip di sini..kena buat post bersiri klu nk crita pon..huhu..
so conclusion la trus...tmpt keja saya ni membuatkan saya tahu yg saya ni seorang yg tabah gak la..haha..bkn pe..byk sgt dugaan di tmpt yg xda sapa2..alone je memanjang..xenjoy dan stress sgt la..tp tu smua bg byk pengajaran la...dpt tau mcm2 jenis manusia..antaranya...

1. manusia hipokrit - depan kita punya baik..crita pasal org lain pelbagai2 pada kita..dan mcm tu jgk la klu blakang kita...depan org len plak kita yg kna kutuk kot..huhu..nak detect senang je org cmne..cntoh klu dia crita kat kita pasal si A katakan, then kita tgk la mcm mana plak dia layan si A...klu depan si A pon dia mesra je maksudnye dia ni hipokrit la..ckp blakang...mcm nk terajang ja...

2. manusia baran - ini klu bleh nk marah ja...silap skit pon dia nk melenting ja..semut mati pon dia leh heboh mcm gajah mati...xreti nk trgur org elok2..yg dia tahu smua dia betui..salah tu bg kat org lain..haha...kpala lutut ko...igt ko tu sapa...mak bapak aku pon xpnah ckp cmtu kat aku tau...ko tu tah sapa2 nk maki2 aku suka hati..lempang mau??

3. manusia mulut longkang - emm...yg ni yg suka mengata, suka mengulas sesuatu berdasarkan pemerhatian sendiri tanpa usul periksa, suka menggabungkan fakta dan membuat kesimpulan berdasarkan logik kepala dia, dan suka mengumpat dan menyebarkan gosip. Waa..yg ni mcm nk sumbat kasut je dlm mulut coz xpasal2 imej gua terjejas..suka hati puak lu ja nk berserita ek..crita la pasal isu semasa ke, isu politik ke, isu minyak ke, lagi berfaedah kot..huhu..sick of u..

4. manusia tunding menunding - yg jenis ni hobi dia suka menunding jari ke arah org lain je xkira la dia salah ke x (lagi 4 jari hala ke diri sndiri kot)..yg pnting dia selamat..xkisah la sama yg dipersalahkan..yg pnting bkn dia..huhu...klu nk tuduh2 tu biar logik der..klu tunding kat aku tu mmg mcm baling boomerang la..balik ke mu jgok boh..

5. manusia bodek - wow..yg ni paling smart..i will do everything for boss..aiseyy..asalkan boss suka...saya pon bahagia (mahu nyer xbahagia, dpt duit lebih la klu boss syg)..huhu..org lain terluka xpe..asalkan hati boss i jaga..camtu plak yer..

6. manusia 'i don't know' - klu tanya dia, mesti dia jawab tak tau...cthnyer klu tanya dia 'mana letaknya bnda ni ye?'..dia akan jawab 'tak tau' walaupon bnda yg dimaksudkan tu letak betui2 depan batang hidung dia...huhu...bkn ape..dorang ni malas nk ambil kisah pasal hal org lain..and klu bleh xmau tau langsung pasal org lain. yg penting dia nyer keje siap. mmg bagus cmne..tp klu ko ada masalah tu..jgn nk cari org lain derr...huh...

itulah antaranya...tp bkn nk kata xde org baik kat situ, ada..setiap tmpt ada yg baik buruknyer...yg baik akan dikenang...yg buruk tu..kalau blhe xnk kenang dah.wat berat kepala je..

ok..skang da resign..so harap tmpt baru xde la cmne ek..terutama yg suka maki2 ni i don't like...yg len leh trima lagi la...huhu...

Saya org Siam

Selepas baca petikan dari berita harian online pada 9 Januari 2011,

http://www.bharian.com.my/bharian/articles/SiambukanThai_/Article/index

saya pon want to say something about topic ni la..

Ok..1st of all..saya kna inform yg saya ni adalah org Siam warganegara Malaysia. Antara soalan yang sering org tanya saya ialah...' dah lama ke datang Malaysia??' u know what..i actually hate this question..sebab nmpk sgt org yg tanya tu kurang pengetahuan pasal etnik2/kaum2 kat Malaysia ni...dan definisi org Siam bg mereka ialah org yg datang dari Thailand..huhu...

tp, kalau org Cina or India, knapa mereka tak tanya soalan tu jgk..oooo...mungkin sebab masa belajar sejarah kat skolah dulu..dlm buku teks ada bagitau pasal kedatangan org Cina dan India ke Semenanjung ni kot...tp org Siam??...xde plak mention sbb kaum minoriti...

Ok..sy pon xpndai sgt nk crita mendalam pasal sejarah ni..tp apa yg saya tahu..org Siam mmg sudah ada di sini terutama kat Perlis, Kedah, Terengganu and Kelantan..sebelum berlaku penyerahan kuasa tanah2 negeri2 tersebut..so xpyh la demo nak tanya lagi dah lama ke aku dtg Malaysia, sebab datuk moyang aku mmg ada kat sini sebelum wujudnya Malaysia lagi..

p/s maap terlalu emosi pasal isu2 mcm ne..

Waa..bagaikan mimpi

tadi saya pegi SP, bawak nakmuay (petinju) pergi timbang berat utk perlawanan akan dtg ne..odw nk balik tu, singgah la kdai nasi kandar sat, mkn tgh hari la kan..
elok2 abih mkn..tiba2 ada panggilan dr company yg saya baru je pegi interview semalam..hehe..dia call nk offer keja kat sy..waa...apa lagi..sronok la coz saya mntk keja yg dekat2 ngan umah..boleh balik umah mkn nasi tgh hari...tido umah..hehe..dan akhirnya dpt..yeee..
bak kata abg saya..Tuah Tahun Golden Rabbit..wee..thanks 2011 for great things..

so, pasni ni bleh la sy jalankan plan2 yg dah diatur..haha..plan apa? itu yg kita xtahu tu..hehe..apa2 pon..ni smua rezeki..sy rasa sgt bersyukur krana dpt smua ni..harap2 keja ni ok and sesuai dgn saya...weeeee

p/s gumbira2..hikhik..

New Year

waa...
selamat tahun baru semua...tidak terlalu lmbt kot utk saya wish new year kan..(tp hari ni da 6hb..huhu..)..
emm...saya nk cakap skit la pasal tahun ni punyer azam...like everyone talk about la kan..

saya sebenarnyer ada byk bnda yg nk buat...tp bnda2 tu mana leh buat sekaligus smua...smua tu perlukan masa..so pelan2 pi la no...
klu nk list down..byk gak bnda2 dlm mind sy yg tetiba terancang tanpa saya sedari...emm...bila saya list2 kan smua2 tu..byk gak azam2 aku ne..hehe
so, saya da plan da...apa yg boleh saya buat utk masa ni...dan juga plan2 yg akan menyusul...huhu...

utk tahun ni..saya harap sgt la saya akan dpt apa yg saya nak..sebab tahun ni tahun arnab..saya kan lahir tahun arnab (ada kaitan ke?)..xkisah la ada kaitan ke tak dgn tahun2 ne..tp saya bleh feel something good la dis year..hope so...^_^

apa2 pun...bkn stakat azam kita ja yg kita kna pk..tidak lupa gak kepada family saya...saya akan do da best for u all..(salah satu azam la ni kan

for everyone, smoga smua happy..

Every Complicated Things Come From The Basic

bosann..

saya bosan...
itulah yg boleh saya conclude kan perasaan saya ketika ini...
saya tak suka keadaan saya mcm ni..huhu..rasa cm hidup xda matlamat...kosong...boring..tak terurus...emmm
saya mahu sesuatu yg xmembosankan..mcm life saya dulu..pnuh excitement..huhu
skang..plain...comman..pegi pagi balik ptg..balik umah..xde org..makan megi..layan internet..tdo...hari2 cmni..emm..
saya fikir balik gak kekadang..saya masuk u blajar hanya utk ini je?? saya mahu berjaya..tp bagaimana?? kalau mcm ne je memanjang...tak kemana saya..hidup yg biasa..tiada apa2 yg mengkagumkan..uhuuuu
tp buat masa ni..saya kena byk bersabar je la..mungkin setiap yg berlaku tu ada sebabnya...dan mungkin saya dpt sesuatu drpd apa yg saya lalui sekarang..mungkin..

sy harap saya akan dpt sesuatu yg sesuai dgn jiwa saya...saya sgt2 berharap..

#_#

wahh..teramatlah lama tidak update blog ini..huhu..xde masa sgt nk mengarang ne...
skang..jam 8.59malam..huhu..baru lepas mkm mee ruski ngan roti bakar buatan sendiri dan juga air kotak vico. emm..cmne je la makan mlm..xde nasi mcm kat umah..huhu...
teringin jgk nk masak..tp masa bila la nk p beli brg2 masak ne..pegi pagi balik petang..balik2 mkn je la apa yg ada..huhu..klu ada geng boleh gak nk masak2 setakat yg mampu..tp ni sorang2..xbest lak masak..huhu..apa2 pun skang da kenyang...tp rindu mau mkn nasi di rumah..huaaa

working life? emmm...ntah ler...xtau nk ckp pe..malas nk taip sebenarnya..pnjg sgt crita mrita dia..apa2 pun..skang saya perlu bertahan..bertahan..huhu..tp parah gak keadaan saya kat sini..serba salah...

i'm alwez stuck between the situation. between person.. person i love...want me to be like they want..like they think the best for me..but never know what i want..i guess..
they just want me to go by flow...go for ordinary life..which i was not..

i don't know how far i'm right..but i just think that i need to fulfill what i want in dis life...no matter how small it is in others mind..but it is big for me..people will never know everything about me...never know what i actually want..and never know what will make me happy...

now i consider myself as 'not happy'..well happy is actually a word dat can be describe by ur own way..it is subjective... my situation right now..is like..totally afraid, unhappy, uncomfortable, boring, lonely, no mission,.....etc.. i hope for change..and i'm still waiting right here...right now..

.........woooo...........i need to stope typing....coz if i continue typing..i may cause some madness to the reader..hehe..bye now...until i have something to share...:)

betray

betray....

how's the feeling when some one u trust betray u??
especially someone that u never guest to be a betrayer...
i got the six sense on what gonna happen..but i just try to ignore since it's out of my thought..or on another word...never think that it's gonna happen
bcoz i trust too much...i appreciate the moment together...i guest long relationship will be trustworthy..but in the end..i'm totally wrong...
i not suppose to believe on someone because i have know them for such a long time... unbelievable...she do me well....
----she is liar..bitch..she is betrayer..i hate her----

friendship= friends in the ship??

friendship...
this word just come to my mind...again..
people have many reasons to make friend..but what's yours?

me...i'm not a social-type person..i like to keep silent..woo...but i can be friend with everyone (as long as they r nice to me)...but in fact.i don't like crowd..
as a friend...i always try to take care of my friends..especially their feeling..but u know what..taking too much care of others make ur feeling hurt as well....
i try to keep comforting others feeling as long as possible..in the other word...as it's not explode the limit...coz me.. is a type of keeping-thing-on-myself...means i keep every feeling..especially uncomfortable feeling from being shout out..so that it could not hurt others feeling...as long as possible....but the most suffer of keeping this thing is me..of coz..but it's ok..coz i don't like quarrel, misunderstanding,...so better keep it..

sometimes...my try-to-ignore-thing attitude make people do fool to me...as they think that i'm always the one that can be bully all the times...damn...
well..i do this bcoz...I'M CONSIDERING THE FRIENDSHIP...i don't want to be anyone's enemy..not bcoz i coward..not bcoz i don't have the crazy, dirty word to say, not bcoz i willing to take those thing as my pleasure, and of coz not to-be-used by anyone....

well then, i consider myself as a very patient human...coz i bet if anyone in my situation...u might drive crazy..huahahah...

sometimes the or most of the times...' i don't care' quotes is very useful actually...bcoz ignoring unnecessary thing will brighting life like sunshine...epic ending..haha...


p/s don't feel to sleep yet..already 4am..continue study (hope so..:P)

this again....

god..
my bad feeling come again..it's my mom...she is sick..
as usual..nobody will tell me if anything happen until I make a call..
my mom suffer on..i don't know what type of illness..but it's make her mouth swell or something..pity her...
now...my tear running out...i really2 hate this situation...i don't want my beloved one suffer...i don't want...even a small suffer...i want them to be happy...enjoy their life...oh god...

my father is sick before...and that period make me like crazy...can't concentrate on anything...but thanks god he is ok now
but now...my mom sick..then i just can't accept this...she is the one that taking care of everyone when they was sick..she took care of my father...me...everyone...but i just think that who want to take care of her when she is sick right now...mom..i want to be there for you...i love you...i don't want to you to be alone...

i will be back home later...as soon as possible...damn i hate this situation..hate this feeling....may my mom will be ok...take care mom...love you

pelik la depa ne

slamat pagi dan gu morning,

ada sesetengah org mempersoalkan...blog tu utk apa? buat apa tulis blog? sound like they don't like keeping blog..well...tu masalah ko...bnda cmni xle nk dipersoalkan la..coz masing2 punya hal la..lantak la nk buat blog ke..diari ke...buku skrap ke..ko duli ape??...aishh...ter'emo la plak...

kadang2 org ni pelik..xhabis2 pelik...seolah-olah apa yg mereka buat tu smua betul..dan kalau ada org yg buat benda yg xsama or bertentangan dgn mereka dianggap salah...xpaham tul la...lantak la org lain nk buat apa pon..jgn sibuk bleh dak..janji dia xkaco hal ko..and xmenyusahkan org lain..and xlanggar norma masyarakat...contoh mcm...ntah le..pk arr sndiri...



emm...tp aku salute arr kt org yg xkisah apa org lain ckp tntang dia..but not for those yg terlalu xkisah smpai dia rasa smua dia buat tu betul..smpai xpeduli apa org ckp...like kalau kita buat bnda yg betul, means xperlu la kisah apa org lain ckp..coz bnda tu betul...lain plak kesnya dgn org yg konon2 konfiden smpai rasa dia dah betul and xnk kisah apa org ckp..moral of the story..klu org ckp bnda yg xbaik pasal kita tu...renung2 la dulu betul ke x...like 'aku ni menyusahkan org sekeliling ke, aku ni buat bnda xbaik ke.....' then kalau ya, improve la diri sndiri...kalau tidak..truskan ja hidup dgn aman dan bahagia (at here baru bleh guna quote--usah peduli apa yg org ckp) coz kita tau apa yg kita buat tu betul....

tu je la bnda yg nk merepek pg ne...tekanan tul my kunci bilik ntah ke mana ntah..terpaksa memanjat tingkap mcm tarzan plak nk masuk bilik...:P..whatever...

--quite long i leave my blog with no input...coz too many thing to be settle..lot of school work...tonne of problem to be think...and now everything seems smoothly flow...hope everything ok...^_^


i noticed dat so long i haven't feel happy..i mean the real happiness...the true, the natural one...like mostly it's fake...and yesterday i feel it..after i have finish one of the big school task for dis semester..and it's the biggest in the whole study period...well..it's give me much release...mind and soul..^_^

well...it's still a lot of task to be done...but i'm so glad that there are no much stress, tension in that..not much matter...thanks God..

here a story to share...about my friend..she's suffering for a kind of disease...sort of neorology thing..and undergo an operation on 8 february...it's yesterday..hope she's ok....
as my friends and i visit her at ward for 1st time..she seems weak..cannot move much..slow motion and hardly trying to talk...2nd day she seem ok..much better..and latest we visit her, a day before the operation...she can sit by her own..can eat and talk quite like normal..and we have told by her aunt dat she's get better bcos of our support to her..kinda FRIENDSHIP ENERGY dat we give her..make her bcome strong...stop being sad..stop crying..it's a miracle..from friendship..i guess..^_^

well then.. i have work to do...i have test tomorrow..just stopping by for awhile after lunch...ok then..snother story in da next post...c ya..:)

love U

1.50am -----14th January 2010

~~Back again~~

at this point, i feel a lot of trouble ..much more...humans are unpredict nowadays...sometime people act like they don't have logical mind to think...doing thing like don't care about others life..although they realize dat their action will give much negative change on others life.

human act weird---as seen in da news everyday..kinda murdering, cheating etc was very common..and much more weird as people around us---people we use to be with--doing shit..

i don't know they doing dis for what reason---but still--could you plz think about others~~moreover--it's change everything on others life--their hope, their ambition, their feeling, their love, their dream....everything--->>>for sure they are very very sick of it...

and from what was happen, i think i have to sacrifice something--my dream--my plan after study---have to be change...i have to help them...they must need me...

---> everyone have different life--and life shouldn't be compare as everyone through different things in life--some must be success---their life don't have much suffer..not much tragedy..not much weird..and they are free to plan and focus on their own life. On the other hand, some have to sacrifice--sacrifice their dream...benefits of their own life...to give others life---the one that need better life...responsibility is on me..i have to help them achieve their dream...mine is not important--as long as i can make u be a better human--try to make u not much suffer dis lost---don't think about human dat never think about u---be strong and i will walk with u through everything---i'm always here---LOVE U ALL SO MUCH---

Happy Birthday

23 december...its my birthday...

a night b4 my bday..i was watching a movie AVATAR..all i can say is It a very great creativity and graphic i ever watch..i say so coz i always can't stand for more than 2 hours movie b4..but AVATAR is different..i felt like throug the movie from starting till the end..much great..and just forgot about my bday then...

well, my birthday..thanks for all wishes and greeting..very appreciate it..coz at least some remember my birthday...

thanks a lot.

nothing special actually on dat day..my family just never remember the day..it's not an upset...it's normal for my family members..nothing special on bday..and normally, we used to not celebrate it...

bday party..mine is not more than 5 times till now..i remember the crazy one..actually twice i have been celebrated by friends.my 17th and my 20th..they do me fool on my bday..but according to them..this is the way dat will make me remember them as well..whatever friends..thanks so much..i appreciate your effort..its really work..i mean it's make me remember the day..remember the flour dat you throw on me..haha..and remember the friendship..precious!!

for dis coming 2010, i just hope dat everything will be ok..smooth flow..everything done on the right way..emm...as i try not to wish for somethings great coz it's just will make me stress..:P

and i realize that..my life..will not success on everything..i mean..i will get what i want..but not all..only some...and it's really happen..and dat was da reason why i try to keep at least 10% on me when i wish for somethings..never hope on anything for 100%..coz it's very hard to accept when its come to failure..*_#...so just keep some failure percentage in case ur not success...well dis is my way and maybe can be consider as advise..depend on what ur life through...coz we r different...rite..and everyone have right to say..but we don't have ability to make people trust or accept our words or way...so..it's depend...

actually, i always have things running on my mind everytimes..and cannot be put here everything..also lazy to type..:P

ok then, merry xmas and happy 2010...have a great year throughly and ever...:)

it just

finish exam..going home~~emm
then come back for doing research project~~
home again~~then start new semester~~~bla3
and--nothing interesting>>don't feel excited on those
well..just through

stuck

now..i got 2 more exam to go. but my mind still blur-blur coz just finish the latest exam yesterday. i think i need time to reset my mind before starting the new subject..

totally blur..can't concentrate on study..why...why??

many things come on my mind..i don't know..nonsense..

well, i have think to wite here but i'm too tired to figure the wordy out...plus i'm lazy now..feel like don't want to do anything rite now...huh..

............come on..i have exam to be sit..i have to study...study plzzzzzzz....................

~~music can help me i think---otak jam---

#__#

not happy

--unhappy---

later i got dis feeling back..yeah..got back...after it has been long time not thinking about it.

so far.. i have finish my second paper today..got another 4 to go..huh...it's all ok about exam

the thing is..why i feel unhappy..i'm totally blur about dis...sudden think of future..sudden lose control on tempered..sudden weird thing happen...i don't know..

now..i'm bored..tension..frustrated..and the most one is..become sensitive..yeah it's another 'come back' i got. i have been a very sensitive person since i was young..be a kid...maybe because i'm the youngest..like everyone to follow my mind...maybe my parents pay more attention on me..then i felt like i can get everything i want...but i wonder dat not the reasons....i'm sensitive because i'm through a tough kid life...it too secret to tell..i wanna keep it...and keep it alone..just me and me know this..emm...then i felt that actually there ae no one out there can help me through my life...really2 help...everyone....yeah i mean everyone..have their own life..and try not to mess up their life by others. so, it's better to learn to settle things alone...i have been learning to live alone..for a while....but then i always got into someone..maybe family, friends...to be taking care...

for family, yes...i really love them all...this is a human nature...normal one...sometimes i do think to make them happy by my own..but me alone cannot work it up...they must work too..

for friends,emm...thinking hard....i don't know how many friend in dis world really2 care about friend?? some might say i'm not a person that like to care about others...no..it's not true...

i'm am very caring...can do anything to persons that always care of me.....and i only show this very2 care attitude to the PERSON THAT ALWAYS CARE ME ONLY. i wonder that i will never find dat kind of person to be friend with..for normal friend....then i will be very normal too.. because it's hard to find the loyal one..hurt when sometimes we think dat the person is the best friend..and the person betray...i'm not angry maybe...just upset..huhu

well, dat normal i guess..thanks god cause at least i have people that always listen to me..although i always like to keep everything on my own...just don't want people to think about my problem..don't want people feel bad on me...don't want to disturb their life...let me keep every single thing on my own...until i find the one that i trust to say it off...!!_!!

exam--

Tommorow i got exam..my 1st paper for dis semester..

then..tonight gonna be spinning already..nervous..afraid..all dat feeling gloom me..

i try study..do revision..lecture notes...revision books...emm....a lot actually..

sometimes i thought dat dat must be enough to get some awesome result..but mostly it doesn't..

..sometime i trying to figure out the effective way to get good result smartly..but what i get is..nothing come easy in dis life..work smart and work hard is always together..none can stand alone..no any speacial poison..no miracle..nothing of dat magical stuffs to success. Victory is paid by very2 hard work...

maybe one see others success as a great thing and wanna get some..less will thing about the effort dat need to pay...sacrification maybe..

now..i can't concentrate on reading those notes..coz i feel like i gonna go for exam in a second...although i got dis night to do more revision..anything dat can be catch in...

---suddenly remember the quote---> success come from 1% talent and 99% effort...

i don't know how true the quote..but for me...it's depend on ourself...sometimes if there are no talent..also might get problem on doing thing..like people always say-->"i'm not suitable for dis job..i can't do dat job...i don't have luck on dis job...bla3....." easy example is a runner---if he don't have talent..just wish to win only by his effort...then it will give nothing...not even be choose by the coach...^_*

yes, effort is important...but without talent..the 100% can't be achieve....

whatever...dis only my mind say...no argument need...

^_^ ___gud luck for exam___ ^_^